Here I am on Quit Day #4 and I have not even had a puff of a cigarette so the quitting is going quite well. Or is it?
It's a fascinating process my mind and body has been going through and it's making me realize just how addicted I was to smoking in the first place.
My boss has been tremendously supportive - telling me I could come by his office and chat if I needed to take a break (after I accidentally revealed that the day seemed a lot longer without breaks). He even apologized for interrupting me as I frantically chewed on a gross piece of nicotine gum today. (I don't know why they call it gum as it tastes like dried vomit and there's nothing remotely chewy about it. I can only stand to have a piece in my mouth for about twenty seconds).
Boyfriend as well as my friends and family have been supportive as well. Mostly I've been holing up by myself this week as withdrawal has affected both my attention span and my irritability. It has also made for pretty much 3 back-to-back No Spend Days - except for one soda and one bus ride - this week.
Since some readers seemed curious about the method I have chosen to quit (cold turkey with occasional nicotine gum), I have decided to share a little more about my progress.
Today was a lot better in terms of focusing on work and not getting distracted. Still eating too much though have forced myself to drink water at work instead of soda. Perhaps my bringing a family sized snack variety pack to the office in order to save money has been counter-productive as it has given me carte blanch to eat multiple bags of Cheetos in one day.
I noticed my lungs feeling clearer today. Saw a girl smoking today and felt only a little jealous. Told myself that I have quit already and just wanted a cigarette "for old time's sake" only three times today but managed to talk myself out of it.
Not having any cigarettes on me has really clinched the success of this quitting process - money is tight right now so the thought of shelling out 7 bucks for something so bad for me just seems dumb. That being said, I can still taste them on my tongue and my mouth has yet to accept the fact that they're not coming back. I wish the feeling would go away so I would stop eating! According to this web site, my ability to taste and smell should already be improved by now. Does anyone know when the cotton mouth goes away?
I do think I will be successful in this endeavor because I'm a pretty optimistic person and also because I've changed A LOT of negative behavior in the past couple of months so why not this too?
I'm not gonna lie though, I want a cigarette right now and denying myself one, though all for the greater good, is probably the hardest thing I've had to do outside the bar exam.