Mr. Sedaris, the author of books like "Barrel Fever," "Me Talk Pretty One Day" and "Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim,"... is the closest thing the literary world has these days to a rock star. His books — which often dwell on themes of childhood alienation tied to his being gay among straights, and to being the new face among the established after family moves — have sold around 2.5 million copies, according to his publisher, Little, Brown.
His work has been optioned by Hollywood, and he is among a tiny group of writers considered entertaining enough to appear regularly on "The Late Show With David Letterman." And while most authors live in fear that no one will show up at their readings, Mr. Sedaris, 47, regularly charges money and sells out the sorts of theaters that symphonies play in. On his last tour, in 2002, he filled Carnegie Hall, and at colleges he is a draw on par with the director Michael Moore.
It just so happens that my literary hero (at least in the comedy genre) is coming to town! I won't disclose which town to keep away the Internet stalkers but according to his publicist he is coming to a whole lot of towns in the near future, maybe yours too! Tickets cost $37. Cry. I have, drumroll.....
One dollar. And two cents. Don't cry for me readers though, because my bills are paid, I have cash on hand and food in the fridge. What I don't have are tickets to see David Sedaris.
But I have a plan! I will write to David Sedaris and ask for tickets in exchange for publicity on my blog! According to the New York Times, he makes $25,000 an appearance - and that was back in 2004. Surely he can spare a ticket or two, right? And besides, my blog reaches 100 readers a day! If only one person were to buy one of his books - such as the latest When you are Engulfed in Flames - $17.15 on Amazon and eligible for Free Shipping- after reading about it here he could recoup the lost ticket expenses.
I got this idea this weekend when a liquor company representative gave me a free hat at a street fair. To me it was a free hat! To them it was free advertising all day at a crowded event by a cute girl! Even when I don't have money, I realize, I am WORTH money. It's still commerce, right? So here's my letter, being sent to David Sedaris via his publicist Steven Barclay:
Dear Mr. Sedaris,
I am a personal finance blogger writing about my life and money over at Sallie's Niece. I am interested in covering your event in My City for my blog and was wondering if you would be willing to exchange tickets to the show for a review on my blog? I am a big fan of yours and would otherwise be attending the show but don't have the money right now. Please let me know if this is possible and check out my blog if you have a chance!
I'm crossing my fingers that it works because I could really use a laugh right about now. And just in case you are curious why I only have $1 right now, that's what you get when your friends come to town and make you go out to fancy dinners three nights in a row. And you buy a plane ticket. Sigh.